This month Chicago will celebrate Fathers Day without the first father who is now in Washington. That still leaves us 1,061,928 households which include fathers. But as even you have suggested, Mr. President, sometimes the problem with Fathers Day are the fathers....!
Mothers, on the other hand, are naturals for their Day. By every given measure -- biological, emotional, spiritual and traditional -- moms have what it takes to be celebrated. Dads....? I ask you, Sir, how many artists paint padonnas to match their madonnas? How many lyrics are penned to dear-old-father-of-mine? How many children run home with a bloody nose and look for a daddy's lap? How many dying soldiers call out for pappa?
This is not to slam fathers. After all, most believers still think of their god as a guy. But meanwhile back here on earth, florists and candy stores ring up a lot more sales on Mothers Day. And why not? Mothers are what keeps the race going. A few minutes of help from the father-to-be, but now compare his minutes with her months. This new life (at whatever instant you believe it begins) is now lung and ligament a 24/7 part of her own existence. From morning sickness to afternoon exercise to nighttime daydreaming. What only last month was a girl is today a woman. Someone who once lived in her todays, today can't help living in her tomorrows.
I myself a father look at fatherhood as a profound union with my wife. And yet, my wife's union is with cosmic forces I can never touch. Pick whatever name you like-- God, Evolution, Energy, Eternity. While she's dancing in the invisible arms of that ineffable something, I'm still commuting, golfing, and gardening without missing a beat. Or a period. Or a night's sleep.
This June 21st will come and go quietly here in Chicago. As probably it should. Okay, some passing attentions -- a card, a smile, better yet a kiss -- will tell dad you still care. But in any event, the wisdom of the ages should be remembered. The Bible, the ancient Greek dramas, the psychological discoveries by Freud, and yes some of the parenting specials back here by Oprah. Each in its own way is paying tribute to the staggering meaning and meaningfulness of mothers.
Mr. President, a fine way to spend this Fathers Day back here in your Chicago might be for we fathers to get our bearings straight. By tracing them back to the women we made mothers. Back to their place in the galaxy of human existence, to their purpose in the preservation of that galaxy, and to our repudiation of any distractions and desertions of which we may be guilty.
Maybe, lets make this Fathers Day another Mothers Day....!
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I enjoyed this piece quite a bit, but as a very wise father said to me, there doesn't need to be a Hallmark holiday to celebrate "dads". Any special time with a parent, whether it be mom or dad, is a holiday!
ReplyDeleteAnd one thing I do DISAGREE with....DADS are as important as MOMS and DO deserve the gratuitous Hallmark holiday just as much as MOMS :-)
Ahh yes, the "gratuitous Hallmark Holiday!" I'll admit they look great on the cards. And they really do happen sometimes. So whether I've over-sold moms in lieu of dads is open to debate. But I have to say, watching moms and dads I always find more to admire among moms. Whoops, here's a thought. Is that actually admiration or just regret??? I'll have to reflect on that this Fathers Day...
ReplyDeleteDads do deserve a special day because they are special! But we who have Dads should let them know they are special everyday!
ReplyDeleteThat's a very good sentiment....I wish more children felt that way....I know I did...but then as I look back, did I SHOW it as well as FEEL it? Tough question for any kid to ask himself.
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