YOU HAVE TO CRACK A FEW EGGS....

We can all subscribe to the adage: You have to crack a few eggs to make an omelet. But can we all appreciate just how messy that can get? Right now, every president and prime minister in the world goes to bed at night with the same recurring nightmare. Not being able to keep all their eggs in the air at the same time. Dropping even one can mean a splat big enough to collapse the whole kitchen...!

The biggest egg is always the same -- the economy, stupid. The people can be sated with only so many movies and malls. Eventually without jobs and health insurance and pensions, they can become a giant Jurassic Park led by a chunky Fox News Madame Defarge. Leaders keep hiring financial wizards to work their magic on the economy, but all too often the magic is really no more than dice loaded by their best computer guesswork.

Another egg always spinning in the air is education. Pick any leader, pick any year. They all give the same speech: Our future is our children. Trouble is, this egg is even more insusceptible to magic formulas than the economy. Everyone agrees good schools and good teachers are good for our kids and good for our country. After that, no one can agree on anything. All learning is an individual act of self-discovery, but how do we accomplish this in gangland-schools surrounded by sometime-parents?

Religion has always been one of the glues that holds a society together. Be it a hallelujah or an opiate, this egg has been nourishing for centuries. Now, however, the clashing theological debates of a post-religious age can be instantly accessed on the Internet. The result is a cacophony of charges, challenges and confusion. The numbers attending services continue to dwindle in most places, leaving a vacuum not easily filled by even the most passionate televangelists. If ancient man cowered before his gods, modern man often sticks his tongue out.

To be sure, government is one of the biggest eggs. Presidents and prime ministers were at one time deemed the best among us to lead. In today's kitchens, the patrons are no longer so sure about that. Things in here are such a mess, meals just don't taste as good! Time for a new chef! Which chef? Hell, I don't know; just anybody but the current chef! And while feeling this feels good, what exactly happens when you yank the chef with the eggs still in the air? Is that really the best way to get a better omelet?

Recently I walked out of this kitchen. So loud, so angry, so futile in there. When I was about 8, I used to go to my room and take out my faithful Crayola Crayons. Now about 80, I bought a box at the store and opened it up. By golly, the very same box, the very same colors, the very same satisfaction owning the very same rainbow. Now if only this splendid little magic could work back in the kitchen...