Saturday, April 25, 2009

THE LONG TALE OF THE GAY ELEPHANT

Some of us wish Michal Grzes had attend the opening ceremonies of the new Holocaust Museum in Skokie, Illinois where Bill Clinton and Elie Wiesel spoke. But then Michal was busy attending a small holocaust of his own....!

Recently a Polish zoo added a new elephant. Ninio, to its attractions. Only half-ton Ninio is apparently not interested in mating with any of the elephantine femme fatales. In true, family-values outrage, a conservative Warsaw politician Michal Grzes protested, "We didn't pay 37 million zlotys to have a gay elephant!"

When you think about it, Michal is speaking for all the world's angry bigots. All those clear-compassed minds who can confidently tell you where true north is on every issue -- exactly right where they're standing. Gays, marriage, abortion, the Bible, the environment, elephants, whatever you've got they've got the answer.

Sure, everyone harbors some bigotries, often under the banner of "causes," but picking on Ninio could be the straw that breaks the elephant's back. Michal, you old Slavic savant, you perfectly demonstrate why this world of ours is always in trouble. Really! Your ignorant stance on homosexuality is the very same self-righteousness that has energized so many of our world's trouble-makers. Remember that other bigot, that Adolph guy who swallowed up your country in 1939? He had a cause too. The self-righteous destruction of all Slavs and Jews by his Aryan legions whose true-north destiny was to rule a purified world.

Look, Michal, I don't want you to go away mad. But I do wish your uninformed rage would go away. Not likely, though, for homo sapiens has harbored bigotries right from the beginning. Anyone swinging from a different forest than ours we determined was forever "different." The same with the tribes across the river from us. Then the countries across the ocean from us. And always, always those neighbors who somehow just didn't understand "normal" like we do.

Psychologists tell us that putting other people down like this automatically makes us feel taller. Theologians tell us that mankind's Original Sin comes from a pride that can't accept the possibility someone else may be more correct than us. Whatever the cause, the consequences have been interminable. We've been busy hating other people's habits throughout the bloody trajectory of history. Think about it -- no hate, no Alexander, no Hannibal, no Attila, no Crusaders and Jihadists, no KKK, no gay bashers, no Cub-Sox rivalry.

I guess, Michal, this means your hangup with gays is not really a headline-maker after all. Tragically, hating other's habits is page 6 news by now. But wait, here's a possible headline for tomorrow's editions: "Michal Grzes rides Ninio in Polish Gay Parade through what's left of the infamous Warsaw Ghetto!"


4 comments:

  1. i viewed "The Pianist" for the first time last week. i really understood for the first time how it starts small, almost unnoticed. so i understand that you called it right when you called mr. grzes on his little joke.

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  2. Exactly....! Seems like all the big shifts in history start small. So small as to be almost imperceptible at the time. Usually, the result is the people living DURING historic transitions don't realize it was historic until they read about it later on. For example, my parents didn't think of themselves in the 40s as the "greatest generation" any more than I thought living during the 50s were the "happy days!"

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  3. Not to sound like I am agreeing with Michel but to spend all of those precious zlatos and no returns on investment probably irked a portion of the Polish population. I was wondering why their gaydar didn't work on Ninio.

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  4. I too wonder about poor Ninio. Hopefully the zoo's homophobic spokesmen are allowing him the same cage rights as the rest of the herd. Who knows -- maybe Ninio will still prove himself worth their zlotys!

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